Friday, December 31, 2010
This Christmas was fun. We actually had two. On Christmas Eve, we spent time with my family here in Tucson. We ate, passed out gifts and acted like complete goofballs. Of course there was wine. We are Italian after all.
My mom looked at me and her salt and pepper shakers and told me not to mess with them. That just gave me ideas!
I love this picture of Kyle and I, even though I look so much bigger than I actually am.
The cousins were there, except for one who has ostracized himself from the family so much that none of us really consider him family anymore. It's sad to see someone so young be so selfish and blame everyone else for his problems.
Brian bought Rowan his first books. I believe in reading to your children, so this totally excited me!
The next morning, we were up at 330 and on the road by 5. No, we didn't plan the 330 part, we just happened to both be awake and said screw it. Even after having trouble finding food on Christmas day at 5 am, and then having to pull over so I could find a dark alley to pee in, we made it to Flagstaff in just under 4 hours. This made the early hour well worth it. There was almost no traffic, and no one tried to kill us on I-17, like they usually do. We got to have a slightly white Christmas. The snow had been there a few days, but was still pretty. I didn't get to enjoy it like I did on Thanksgiving, because my back was hurting so badly. The reprieve from the desert weather was a blessing though.
We had a nice relaxing weekend. We gave and received some great gifts.
This shirt from India was Kyle's favorite, I think. Go Ian!!
Now I need to get busy and make the other part to this dress.
It's all about the nipple shields!
On Sunday and Monday, we sat on our butts and did crafts. Kyle made necklaces and bracelets out of hemp and stone beads, Pam knitted us some hats, as pictured here on my sister in law Katie, and I worked on cross stitch.
I think the craft days were just the medicine that Kyle and I needed. It was relaxing, we were able to hang out and talk and listen to music we enjoyed. Life is good.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Sunday, December 12, 2010
We went to breakfast with my parents this morning. The morning was a little rough because I was woken up at 3:40 by gunfire. Scared the living shit out of me. My windows on the house were opened, and it sounded really close. I will at some point be getting a gun safe, and will have something in the house to protect myself with.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Like anyone would be
I am flattered by your fascination with me
Like any hot blooded woman
I have simply wanted an object to crave
But you're not allowed
An unfortunate slight
Must be strangely exciting
To watch the stoic squirm
Must be somewhat heartening
To watch shepard meet shepard
But you're not allowed
An unfortunate slight
Like any uncharted territory
I must seem greatly intriguing
You speak of my love like
You have experienced like mine before
But this is not allowed
An unfortunate slight
I don't think you unworthy
I need a moment to deliberate
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
He had freaked out on the phone with his dad, somehow thinking that we wouldn't go and see him last night. He reassured him that we were in the parking lot.Once we were there, he calmed down greatly. Apparently he had been given the Zyprexa again, but I didn't see the transition that I had seen the first night.
I did see more, although slight improvement though, and that gives me hope and strength. Those two emotions are going to get me through the next bit of time, that and the strong support system that we have. We are going to try to set up a care conference today. I think that the staff could gain a lot of insight from us.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Reba: Seems seriously depressed, she hasn't moved from that spot on the couch in a while. She's usually the most active in the house.
Pepper: Seems to be the "fixer." She is going around giving hugs and kisses. Not just to me, but to Reba as well. She came up to me this morning, put both of her paws on my shoulder, and buried her head in my chest. It was just what I needed.
Butters: Is completely lost. It seems obvious that my normally rambunctious kitty doesn't know what to do with himself. He even tried climbing up the sleeve of my snuggie, which is way to small for him to fit into. If I stop petting him, he attacks my hand. Now he is meowing for more attention, either from me or from the dogs.
Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I did. Hopefully my husband can get the help he needs for a problem he doesn't want to admit he has. Hell, I didn't want to admit it. He's never acted this way in the three years that I've known him. I'm hoping that he starts talking to the doctors soon. I had him convinced to last night. The paranoia that is haunting him is downright scary. He has accused me of everything from being a cop to faking this pregnancy. He almost got us killed in a car accident.
I am pretty convinced that he's in a manic phase of bipolar disorder. Only time, and doctors will tell. I wish I had seen it for what it was earlier, maybe it wouldn't have taken such drastic measures, but I didn't know. I am very lucky. He knew something was wrong, and he knew he needed to go to the hospital. He went willingly, although by the time we went, he could barely move under his own power. He acted as though he were in physical pain. I had to leave him there. That was, by far, the hardest thing I've ever done. I left in tears and headed to my parents' house. I wasn't ready to come home yet. From there, I spoke with the psych nurse several times. Kyle wouldn't talk to anyone, she told him that he was the worst case they had seen in a while. He was lying on a bed crying, nothing he said was discernible. She thought it would be wise for me to go ahead and fill out a petition, just in case he tried to leave. I agreed. There was no way I thought he should be anywhere but where he was.
I drove back to fill out the paperwork, and the psych nurse surprised me. She told me that if I was ok with it, I should talk to Kyle, and I should try to talk him into being cooperative and accepting treatment. Of course I was agreeable. I want to see my husband get better. I went in to see him, he saw me and started sobbing. We got him into a small private room, and all he would say is, "I want to go home." I told him he couldn't, that I thought he was going to hurt himself. We talked for a while and I was able to get him to stop crying. The nurse came in and asked him if he wanted treatment. He consented, and I sighed relief. The other nurse came in a few minutes later and offered him Zyprexa for the psychotic effects he was having. About 20 minutes later, I saw my husband for the first time in 5 days. We had a good conversation. I was even able to make him smile. I thought it was going to be hard to leave him again, and I dreaded it from the start. The Zyprexa made him very sleepy though, and I asked him if he was ready for bed. He was. I walked him over to the bed and tucked him in, kissed him goodnight and left.
This next few days is going to be hard. Luckily we have a great support system. My mom stayed with me last night, his mom will be here tonight. This is a long, rough road, but we are a strong couple, and I know we will get through it. As I told Kyle last night, it's a big bump, but we need to get in the truck and run it the fuck over.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Or maybe, just maybe, it was the small bundle growing rapidly in my belly.
Something beautiful to remind me that there is something to be thankful for. I had a blast this weekend. I haven't enjoyed Thanksgiving that much in a long time, maybe ever. We were surrounded by friends and family,
It was a house full of love and laughter, and now, I can't wait until next year. On a side note, I ate enough to feed 6 cows and only gained one pound.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Rather than spend exorbitant prices for my dresses, and my hubby's clothes, I've decided to sew my own garb. It has been an interesting road, one filled with beer (before I was pregnant), lots of F-bombs, and many hours of ripping out seams. It's also been fun. I've found something that I seem to have a natural talent for, and every time I make something new, I see a bit of improvement. I found the last set of dresses I made here. These internet patterns were fairly easy to read and easy to assemble. I have found a couple of things that I will change when I make the apron dress again. The underdress took me two tries, as the given measurements didn't compensate for my boobs. Luckily, it was so easy that it only took me a couple of hours to whip out after getting better fabric yesterday. Here is a pic of the two unfinished products.
I have since added straps to the outer dress, done both necklines, and hemmed both. I surprisingly got a lot accomplished today despite a case of the screaming shits that knocked me flat on my ass for a few hours.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
I haven't had cable in 2 1/2 years. I am amazed at the number of people that don't understand what I "do." Or those that ask, "Well, what do you watch?" The answer. What ever I feel like it, when and if I feel like it. I do pay for netflix, and if I am inclined, I watch TV on there. If I watch something, it's just for an hour or so, then I move on with my life. Hell, half the time people sit in front of the TV even when there's "nothing on." Then what the hell are you doing watching it?!?!? Go outside, play with your kids or pets, talk to your spouse, have sex. There's so much more you can do with your time!!!!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Last week, I decided that it was time to start looking for an on-call job. Nothing with regular hours, just something to supplement our income. On Wednesday, while at L/D clinicals, I got an email from my old boss at my last job. The gist of it: "I don't know if you're still interested, but the on-call position just opened up." This was my ultimate job. For something to get through school, and make as much money as possible in as few hours as possible, $16 an hour isn't bad. It's an easy job, and I loved the people I worked with, even when some of the corporate stuff didn't quite work for me. So hear I am, waiting for a start date, can't wait to start getting some paychecks!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
For those of you who don't know about my animals, here's there story.
My girls.I had my house built in the fall of 2007. In mid-October, my mom and I drove out to see if the foundation had been poured. We parked the truck, and got out. I looked over to the wall where my back yard would be, and a head popped up.
The head didn't run away, so I started talking to her. A few seconds later, a second tiny head popped up next to the first one. This head kept her distance
We slowly walked up to them, and were then attacked with kisses from head #1, which we furiously fought off, not knowing where they had been. Head #2 slowly approached us, and we noticed she was favoring a front paw. I was able to get her and look at it, but could see nothing too apparent. We gave them water, but at this point my mom convinced me to leave them there. I was staying at my parents' house, and their dog isn't capable of being around other animals. We left, crying. My dad took one look at us and asked what was wrong. We told him. About 20 more minutes of crying and he looked at me said, "Get into the truck," and we left. We drove the 20 minutes. It was agony. 40 minutes had passed and there was so much space around my lot. We got there, got out of the truck, and just as before, both heads popped up. I was able to grab head #2 fairly easily. He (I thought, since there was frantic humping of mother going on) was pretty small. My dad went after head #1, but couldn't get her. I told him to keep #2 in the car and was able to grab her fairly easily. I rode home in the back seat with them, feeding them handfuls of water, and comforting them. When we got home, I decided to flip #2 over to see what was going on down there. She was a gender confused little girl.
Yes, she has been broken of the humping. We tried to separate them with a chain link fence, but we soon found out that Reba (Head #1) was part monkey. We had to set up a semi permanent wooden fence to keep them separate from my parents' dog. Even with the 6 food block wall around the yard, Reba kept getting out. Pepper (Head #2) never exhibited this behavior, and was content in the yard. When we finally did get them out to my house, we fitted Reba with the invisible fence system to keep her in the yard. For the most part, it has worked. She had one incident and now her collar is up as high as it will go.
The Cat.My husband is a cat person. Me, not so much. I figured though, in order to be happy, we should all have our way. Last year for Father's day, I drove over to a local cat shelter that was having a sale on kittens. $30 got you a fixed immunized little kitty. I settled on this little orange guy that didn't seem to have a care what went on around himMy main concern was that the dogs would have issues with the new family member, so over the next few weeks we slowly integrated him. They all get along now, and he seems to complete our little family, as far as pets are concerned.